a lot of people fall in love with me. a lot of people want to try it out, think that we could make it work. a lot of people can envision themselves with me for life. 

what i am: raw, angry, explosive, tired, rotting and rotten

what you see: soft, sweet, curved, smiling, wet, wet, wet

you've got to stay in your lane, because i am bigger than the journey itself. unless your lane causes the end of mine, i am not interested in anyone else's demarcations. and an ending would be welcome. 

it's no longer clear to me that there's anything "worth it" to be won, that there's anything redemptive or even enjoyable at any point along the road. i thought that someone would love me eventually, i thought maybe i'd know what it was to not be alone. i no longer think those things will happen for me.