Dating profile 

Likes: cuffed sleeves, pretty ink, dimples, an easy humor, a gentle rapport 

Turn offs: getting impatient with customer service, crocs, ever calling the cops, organized religion of any kind, sexist jokes you think I’m gonna laugh at, ignoring babies or animals 

About me: absolutely batshit insane with a pussy that matches, daddy issues you can’t even imagine because you have never been in a cult, fire, anger, heat, churning, yearning, ferocious, fire, consumption, regret, disease, alcohol, utopia, praise, adoration 

Tastes like: salt and tears, cum and honey, chai and cinnamon, thyme and rosemary, old bay and white pepper,  basil and salt, salt and honey, cum and chai 

Listening to: your mother singing along to her Walkman in 1982