the consequences of ray's choices in my life have been:

losing my job and therefore my health insurance
losing my professional reputation
losing my personal reputation
losing many friends because they believed ray
losing many more friends because they believed lavonna, amber, kim, erika, and the rest of that ilk
losing thousands and thousands of dollars in legal costs
losing my credit score to accrued and unpaid medical debt that isn't mine that i can't afford
losing my love of this house, the place i said would be mine forever, that is now a trauma minefield
losing my financial stability, which has trapped me in this house
losing my financial independence and having to ask for help from my parents
losing my car
losing my nervous system, and a major increase in ptsd reactivity
losing my mental health, and a major increase in suicidality
losing my physical health, and a major increase in illness and daily pain
losing my in-law family
losing my respect for every part of the legal and criminal system i interacted with
losing my ability to trust others
losing my hope to exist in any kind of family ever