where you are, the only place
i'd want to be or could imagine myself--
my whole self, all parts,
all breathing and skin and warmth--
where you are is perhaps all i can ever be
till i outgrow this body, this age.
i realize there's no one waiting,
i realize this place
is empty now, is barren, is moments
away from being forbidden--
where you are, in that dim room
that smells like home and sex,
is it better there?
i am staggering drunk down streets,
finding myself on steep concrete stairs,
waiting to wander or wonder:
where you are, the only place
i can be, and can't find.