i've never doubted fire before
but there is a yearning to be clean now,
a desire for that stark bright skin--
when i set it all up in flames
i thought i could wipe myself clear of you,
thought the flicker of my hatred
would purge my heart and body.
i guess the burning was incomplete,
left you too many handholds and stairsteps
to climb back inside of me,
roost or perch there like some vulture,
and when i love you again,
maybe i will call you a phoenix instead.