little things mean EVERYTHING
when i lack you i lack everything
distance is a great deal more than miles.

sometimes the silence is greater than me
and my body is not enough to stop the gap.
small fish in a big pond, i stock faith in
the power of rash youthfulness.
unfortunately
impetuousness now fails me, too.

moonlight sunlight starlight
oceanic tides
places we have walked, words we have used
lakes and mountains and cities
and suburban sidewalks,
we have mounted stands against them all
and we fall against
insurmountable weight now.

like brick walls we crumble in old age
the mortar around the edges goes first, yellowing
like parchment, cracking like deserts that have known water
and then the bricks themselves
red but bleached
solid but eroded

in the core of me there is a deep blue fire
with crosshatched emotion in the grate.
from four corners, hate rage fear grief
create a pessimistic plaid from which rises
the flames that keep me moving.
ironically, this blue, this pale playing blue
turns red at the core and preserves close to this
iron grate a blinding spring
of light and love and playfulness.

one day i will walk free against tall wheat
and you'll hold my hand against the length of the field.